Monday, April 20, 2009

Great Expectations

Prostitution has been known as the oldest profession for centuries. It is important to point out, however, that prostitution as commonly defined does not encompass the different kinds of prostitutions there are actually in existence in the world today. It is a harsh truth to accept that dating is one of those kinds of prostitution that are not recognized as such in the present time. There is a misunderstanding of the concept of payment, which is the basis for dating to be a kind of prostitution. A clarification is in order that although there is a widespread belief or tradition that requires men to pay whenever a couple goes out whether to dinner or to the movies and the like, it does not matter who pays because if it is not a fifty/fifty split of the costs, then it is prostitution. This is a situation that repeats itself in marriage as well.
As a couple in a prosperous relationship, people always want to do certain things together whether this means merely spending time with each other seating at a bench watching the sunset to having dinner, watching movies or even traveling. There are activities that do not involve a monetary transaction in which case the relationship is simply that: a couple of equal people spending time together in a romantic way. Conversely, if there is money involved, the situation changes. This problem begins when two people meet. For example, if they meet at a club and the man buys the woman a drink, then there is an underlying expectation for her to dance with him; and, in many occasions if she agrees to such and he continues to buy drinks, the expectation grows into believing the woman would go home with him that night. A situation otherwise known as one nightstand where through paying for the drinks, the man has paid for the woman to sleep with him. From meeting someone in such situation, one can understand why it is prostitution. It could perfectly function the other way as well because women are nowadays independent and able to earn their own money, which means they can also pay for the drinks.
When there is already a self-defined couple, they seem to be officially exempt from societies judging eyes. Although the same twisted belief, which says men should pay for everything, women sometimes take a stand and they decide to pay or at least to divide the cost in equal amounts. The problem here is that the situation remains the same as the one previously exposed when two people meet at a club or a bar. The difference is that in this case the couple does a lot more things together that might involve monetary transactions. But there is still the expectation that they will have sex at some point in the relationship whether right away or after a few weeks or a couple of months. It is not necessarily openly accepted that such event is all there is to wait for in the relationship, but it is an important stepping-stone in today’s society. Before people believed that one should wait until marriage, now everyone wants to take the car out for a drive before they buy it.
If marriage occurs, the situation does not change much. There are the extreme cases when it is very clear that the only reason the marriage took place was due to the economic interest of one party but the other one does not care. This is clearly a way to pay for a wife or a husband. There are other cases where the couple appears to divide the bills and the like as well as the payment for their outings and trips, but there is always a certain expectation that one of them will contribute more whether it is because said person earns more money or for other reasons. Provided they are already married and society is very accepting of these situations, if it not evenly divided, it is still prostitution. It can still be included because one way or another it still implies paying for sex; and, there are obviously complications when there are children.
There is not anybody allowed to hijack a Ferrari if they do not know how to drive. People must know what they step into. So, unless either party involved is ready to share in the good and the bad whether marriage is involved or not, they should not attempt to form a couple. Otherwise, a different label will be required.

Poison Drops

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